thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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