I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
