Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.