Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
