Non-Jews are for practice
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
