did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
The ass gains better be worth it
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