I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
