Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
