it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
