My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
