Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
You did what with his pubic hair?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize