You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
