i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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