The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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