Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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