i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
