I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
My dick has a subreddit
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize
