some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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