So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
