dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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