Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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