Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize