Buhtt sex?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize