Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
