3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
