Christians are straight up FREAKS
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
