Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
