guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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