this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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