a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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