She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
