Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I skipped work to stalk him.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
