dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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