my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
