at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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