Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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