matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
