windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
This beer is not sobering me up at all
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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