the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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