i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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