i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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