My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Still dying that you shit outside
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
