honey bunches of taint.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
