You're so nebulous sometimes
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
