I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize