it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
