If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize