Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
