she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Randomize
