My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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